Crazy Mercy In A Swimsuit

Well I finally did it.  I had enough guts to look at the keywords/phrases that people Google that lead them to Family Stories [provided by Google Analytics].  I say, "guts" because I've heard horror stories about the words and phrases that come up.  I mean, did I really want to know?  Now that I've gone over the report, oh yeah, I want to know!  While on our 3-mile morning walk, I was telling my husband some of the phrases, and we were laughing so hard that it was messing up our pace, which is a big "thing" for my husband.  I take my phone on our walk, and before we begin my husband always asks me, "Time?" and I always reply, "...to go back to bed."  [See, I'm just as funny in real life as in virtual life.]

I am very happy to report that the first 6 keyphrases that generated the most visits involved some kind of variation of "family stories".  Overall, there were 33 keyphrases that involved some form of "family stories" bringing a total of 310 visits with this phrase in the last 30 days .  That's a good thing since that's the title of my blog.  Some of the funnier ones were:

• "my family story" [Obviously, this person was hoping that someone had already done the research on their surname, My.]
• "sad family stories" [I have a few, but I know I don't really want to seek my own sad family stories out, much less someone else's.]
• "spanish stories about what your family does every day" [Que?]
• "stories about family problems" [Read on ~ I've got plenty of those.]
• "stories that include grandmother and family" [Hm.  Grandmother?  Stories?  I just might have a few of those around here somewhere.]
• "what are family stories" and "what is your family story?" [You have SO come to the right place.]

There were 21 visits generated from phrases that involved the word "Alamo" and most were concerning projects.  This indicates to me that there a lot of teachers that are assigning Alamo projects, and probably didn't appreciate my post, "Remember the Alamo!"  However, I'm real sure that the parents did.  It also indicates to me that there is a real need for a site/blog for Alamo and/or student projects, and if I could find a way to make money at it,  I'd be all over it like cheese dust on a cheetoh [What's in cheese dust anyway?].

There were 9 visits generated by searches that included the word "kringla".  I know exactly which blog post that this came from ~ Family Trees and Norwegian Kringla from Iowa.  Apparently, there are others out there that are seeking the secret of the kringla.  I am not alone.  Somehow, there is comfort in that.  Unfortunately for these seekers, my post does not unravel the secret, but it does provide commiseration.
There were 7 visits generated by searches that involved the phrase "swimsuit" [mostly from my posts "Family Stories: Swimsuit Edition" and "Remember the Alamo!"] including:

• "john wayne in swim suit" [Why is someone Googling this?  Never mind.  I really don't want to know.]
• "swimsuit accident stories" [What kind of accidents are there with swimsuits? Malfunctions?]
• "my sister swimsuit pics" [Eeeww, I think.]
• "family pictures taken in swimsuits" [Uh.  See previous, I think.]

There were 5 visits generated by the following 2 phrases: "stories of mercy" and "stories about mercy".  This was caused by my post "Does Time Reveal Mercy" which is the name of an ancestor of my husband's and was probably not what they were looking for, but I could be wrong.

There were 3 visits generated by phrases that involved the word "crazy" that were caused by my post, "Sometimes Crazy Works":

• (2) "sometimes crazy works" [I know what I meant by crazy.  What did they mean?]
• "crazy family living stories" [Were they just curious about crazy families or were they looking for some commiseration because I have that...And "living" as opposed to what? Dead?]

There were 3 visits generated by the keyword/name "Oscar" that were mainly caused by my post "What's In A Name: Oscar". [Amazing, right?]  Two of them were:

• "the story of name Oscar" [I definitely had one of those, but was it the one they were looking for?]
• "what do you think of the name Oscar" [Well, I think it's a fine name...especially for a donkey.  See my post.]

There were 2 visits generated by the keywords "mitochondria" and "organelle" caused by my post, "It Could".  I am real sure that it wasn't what they were looking for, but I think I could hold my own in a discussion of mitochondria.  I'm just not willing to bore my readers with all the details.  Here were the keyphrases:

• "funny short stories about organelles" [You know, I had everything but the "funny" with my post.  You can't please everybody.  Oh, and who is looking for and why, exactly, are they looking for these kinds of stories?  Are organelles really all that funny?]
• "what does the prefix mito mean from the word mitochondria" [I'm glad you asked.  It means "threadlike".  See, I can hold my own.]

There were some miscellaneous ones that were funny as well:

• "a girl and tin cup" [Was there someone else with a 2nd great-grandma who would get her tin cup filled up with Irish Whiskey in the back of a saloon? "I'd Bet My Tin Cup"]
• "angels in purple robes" [Did someone else have a naked grandma in heaven? "Becoming Aware"]
• "cajun historical stories" [I have one story about my cajun neighbor ~ probably wasn't what they were looking for, but hey, they stayed & read for seven minutes and forty seconds, or they got up to go to the bathroom with it still on the screen. "A Cajun's Who's Who"]
• "dad's name with extra d" [Daddy?  Buddy?  I don't know.  I need more to work with.]
• "how to start an orange orchard in the rio grande valley" [Plant an orange seed. Water. Pick oranges. Start over. From "Maybe I Could Touch Heaven"]
• "it's a family bag" [Hee-Hee.  I know they weren't looking for this bag: "It's In the Bag"]
• "slingbaum genealogy" [This is Mercy's maiden name.  Obviously, she was on the receiving end of some mercy when she married a Haley.  No offense to any Slingbaum's out there.  I give you permission to make fun of my name all you want to. "Did Time Reveal Mercy?"]
• "what are the pointer stories" [I'll show you mine if you show me yours.]

All joking aside, for the last 30 days, through Google search, I had 406 visits through 116 keywords with 96% new visits.  The longest time spent reading my stories was: 29 minutes and 14 seconds, or they fell asleep reading, or ate a meal with my blog site still on the screen.  Not really bad considering I wasn't trying.  So, if you see that my new posts have a whole bunch of keywords, you'll know why I'm doing it.  I'm just kidding.  I'm not going to do that. [Really.]