Sunday, October 30, 2011

Another Letter to Linda

Hey Linda!!

Another year has gone by. Hard to believe, right? They seem to go by so fast. Not. Fair.

You would not believe how big the kids are now. Caitlin is as tall as me and wears the same-sized shoe as me ~ a size 7. She says compared  to all the other girls she has small feet. I say she has the perfect sized foot for all those strappy heeled sandals that just don't look right on bigger feet. It's a matter of perspective. Regardless, we had a helluva time finding basketball shoes for her and we ended up ordering them online. [pic enclosed] Snazzy, eh?

Oh yeah! Speaking of basketball shoes, she made the 9th grade basketball team! Blake and I are so proud of her, and I know you are too. She's worked so hard for this. Also? She's on the debate team. She and her partner compete in the Public Forum type of debate. We don't get to see her compete, but I have been on the receiving end of her questioning and arguing, and I know I didn't like that one bit. But apparently she's very good at it, because she's almost halfway on her way to lettering in debate her freshman year. Finally, she has a positive outlet for her headstrong and talkative ways. Some days it's hard to remember that those are positive attributes, you know? And it's so good to hear her be so passionate about debate and basketball.

But Blake and I are SO proud of her.

Speaking of proud, you would not believe how big Ryan has grown. He's as tall as both Caitlin and me. Really. And he's on the 7th grade football team. He's never played before but he's trying, learning, and loving every bit of it [except the part about being at practice at 6:30 in the morning].

And he's so quiet compared to Caitlin! It's so funny because he seems so serious, then he'll pull off a witty one-liner right out of the blue. Makes you wonder what he's thinking all the time. He has  an economy of words [which is good because Caitlin has an abundance of them].

He loves the Discovery Channel, the History Channel, and anything to do with space. If you're not careful, he'll draw you into a one-sided conversation about space. And I feel bad when this happens, and not for the reason you think. I honestly don't know what he's talking about. I can't wrap my brain around all those theories he talks about. Seriously. But I love that he's so passionate about it.

On most days, you can find Ryan outside with his buddies doing what 12 year old boys do. He's very popular here at home. The doorbell is always ringing, and it's always for him. A lot of the young boys on the street look up to him, and I think all of that says a lot about his character.

Again, Blake & I are SO proud of him.

I wish you could have gone shopping with Caitlin and me for her first Homecoming Dance dress, but I've enclosed a pic of her. Isn't she gorgeous?

I wish you could have seen her 1st basketball scrimmage yesterday. She played tough, and I caught it in this pic. Watch out for her elbow.

I wish you could have seen Ryan play football this season for the first time, but much to his chagrin I caught him in this pic after one of his games. Blake says he looks tough. I say he looks like tired and hot.

I wish you were here to listen to Ryan explain all about his space stuff. I don't have a pic of it, but think of a black hole. But? I have this pic of him from when we were in New Orleans this summer. Isn't he handsome?

The fact is, Linda, I just plain wish you were here with us. There are some days a kid needs a hug and a smile from his grandma. Nothing else will do, you know? [And sometimes a son and daughter-in-law need a hug and a smile too.]

And I know you wish you were here, too. Just sucks all the way around, doesn't it?

Oh, and guess what! Caitlin still wears the shirt I made for her about this time last year. She asked me just the other day, "Mom, where's my grandma shirt?" You remember it, don't you? The pink one? [pic enclosed] Every time I go to wash the damn thing I get glitter in my eyes and it causes my eyes to water. Damn glitter.

It's been 12 years since we last saw your smile.

It's been 12 years since we last heard you laugh.

It's been 12 years since we last saw your face.

It's been 12 years since we last had a hug from you.

We miss them.

And we miss you.

Love Always from Your Daughter-in-Law,

Linda, my mother-in-law, valiantly fought breast cancer, and I've written about her here, here, and here previously.  I hate breast cancer. It's gotta stop. Damn stupid cancer. [I feel a little better getting that off my chest. Just a little.]

So, what can you do? At the top of my sidebar up above, is a button/link from the Breast Cancer Site.  With every click, a sponsor donates, and 100% of the donation goes to helping women afford mammograms.  And the only thing you have to do is click it.  That's it.  So, click it.


  1. Wow! What a great open letter. And the best thing, is that I am sure Grandma Linda IS keeping up with every milestone that happens in your family, nodding and smiling as you mention them. Thanks for sharing, Caroline. This has to be one of my favorite posts!

  2. I'm so sorry for your loss. We lost my uncle from lung cancer in Spring of 2010. And a two church friends this year. Not sure what kind because it spread so fast. And a dear friend this summer from colo-rectal cancer. Cancer sucks. Cancer sucks monkey butt. I'm not sure why I always think of that, but one day my daughter and I were trying to think of the stinkiest, suckiest things ever, and that's what we ended up on. Breast cancer definitely sucks monkey butt. Sending cyber hugs from corn country - Steph/Corn&Cotton

  3. Poignant, sad and heartfelt...I'm sure Linda got the message.

    I clicked.

  4. This is beautiful, just like she was, you are, and your daughter will be.

  5. Beautiful letter. I clicked. Breast cancer runs in our family.

    I've lost a few friends over the years due to cancer and more recently my grandfather in April. His was an especially aggressive type and we barely had time to get used to the fact he was sick before it took him away from us. I'm still ticked about it.

  6. What a nice way to remember someone. And a nice way to record what your children are doing. I have traveled the cancer road with my husband. Not a fun road. I wish we could eliminate all types of cancer from the world. Maybe one day we will.

  7. You certainly know how to make me cry! Beautiful letter!

  8. What a wonderful letter, Caroline. It's easy to see that Linda was a very special lady, and this is a great way to honor and remember her.

  9. Each letter you write to Linda helps us get to know her better. Surely your children feel the same way. Keep it up, it's a great tribute.

  10. What a nice way to remember someone.Nice family story


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